I think I need to tie up some loose ends of Alvin’s brilliant vagina post.
Reducing it to five kinds of vags will certainly make it neater for instance. So here goes:
In the eyes of guys, there are five (not six as noted by Alvin) kinds of girls, in ascending order of attractiveness:
1) Girls they won’t fuck, settle down with, or even befriend who are more or less the same as girls they won’t fuck or settle down with, but would befriend.
2) Girls they will fuck once, but will never settle down with.
3) Girls they will fuck over and over again, but will never ever settle down with (like the infamous Vivian?).
4) Girls they will fuck over and over again and will settle down with, given sufficient time and boredom or unavailability of other girls.
5) Girls they will fuck over and over again and will settle down with instantly!
Type 1 (now merged with type 2) is obvious. These are the super-obese whales, ugly or old or the ones with disabilities (whatever they may be), the ones from a totally-different socio-economic background (e.g. beggars), old women, etc. Guys wouldn’t even befriend these, because it’s an embarrassment to even be seen in public with them, and they probably have nothing in common anyway.
Type 2 is less obvious. Why would a guy fuck a girl once, but not twice or more? The answer is simple: for the experience, to tick a checkbox on his bucket list, to add a number to his lay count easily. These are usually “novelty girls” that guys fuck just to be able to say they’ve done it, even if they have zero attraction to them, e.g. fat chicks, black chicks, chicks of a certain nationality/religion, MILFs, decent-looking but disabled chicks, etc.
Type 3 is where most girls (women? females?) fall into. They think that they’re hot shit that some guy is sleeping with them, but guys will fuck just about any hole, because they honestly have nothing to lose. As a type 3, you think you’re sizzling stuff just because he chose to fuck you?
Congratulations, you’re part of the 90% of women he will fuck just for sport. When he’d fuck you over and over again while avoiding all commitment, you’re not friendzoned, you’re fuckzoned, which is guys’ way of telling girls that they’re unworthy of a relationship, but they’ll still keep the girls around for ego purposes. Girls become type 4 because: 1) they’re just not girlfriend-material (usually that means she’s too slutty), or 2) the guy thinks he can do better, so he holds out.
Type 4 is a little fuzzier. May be it should be another type 4?
Technically, type 5 is a SUPER-RARE direct result of a category 4 girl who eventually turns out to be less slutty than expected, or it becomes painfully obvious that she’s as good as it gets for him, and he’s just tired dating around and just wants regular sex and companionship without having to seek for it all over again.
Still, it’s rare that, once a guy decides that she isn’t good enough, he’ll change his mind. It simply doesn’t occur very often but shit happens yo.
He knows what he’s able to get, and, if someone out of his league falls into his lap, he will grab her with both arms, a leg and whatever. The reason he didn’t is that she’s below his league, and he knows it. Any guy with self-respect will not date down.
Type 5 is obvious. If you’re a guy, she’s hotter than you and hotter than you’ve ever done before, it would be an utter honour to even be associated with her.
She’s classier, slimmer, prettier, sexier, and more refined than any other broad you’ve tagged before — a super duper fabulous catch.
It will be a privilege for a guy like you to be with a girl like her. If you could settle down with her immediately … all your male and female peers will turn green with envy, and very very few will feel genuine happiness for you, because they’ll be clouded with utter envy and jealousy.
As for you, you lucky bastard, you can parade her around like a trophy and shout loudly everywhere that she’s your girlfriend. Guys know that a type 5 girl just doesn’t fall out of the sky, because type 5 girls are going after guys who’re above their league too, usually young, rich guys.
What’s really frustrating is that very often girls from the other types mistakenly have the illusion that they belong to type 5 and start to have the audacity to expect the princess treatment.
When they don’t know their place, and they try to expect girlfriend-like treatment (e.g. real dates, birthdays, anniversaries, cuddling sessions, picking her up, flowers/gifts, sex withholding, etc.), it makes guys just want to say, “Really? Are you kidding me? Do you even know where you stand, and have you looked at yourself in the mirror?”
Like I would settle for you … for fuck’s sake.
What an insult it is to think that you’re the best I can do. Girls need to be super-realistic and shoot for guys who see them as a type 5 girl (i.e. guys with no options). If you go beyond, you have only yourself to blame when you’re outbid by your hotter, younger, skinnier, sexier competitors.
Trust Alvin (and me), when a guy doesn’t want to commit or settle down, it’s because he either has access to better sluts out there or he knows that he can do better. There’s zero stigma to being single for a guy, so really they don’t mind holding out.
Like it or not, girls, this is the way it is. You can whine and bitch about it. You can only improve yourself to compete better.
But what’s the point of classifying them anyway? Hmmm.
Beats me.
Bakar Merah Red Burn 